𝒞𝒽𝒶𝓇𝒾𝑜𝓉 @ch4r10t_tv@masto.anarch.cc

I just wanted to let you all know today that I treasure my community, colleagues and friends who have supported me and continue to do so. I don't know where I'd be without you. I treasure every day.

I'm feeling good about the prospect of being more essay-focused for a while, with some occasional unscripted segment content. mostly I'd like to provide more material this year that gives my channel a stronger baseline for following up on some of the stuff that originally re-invigorated the channel.

knocked out the script for the chait response this morning. thinking that one will go live on the channel in august or september.

*has resolved

we'd better get rian johnson's film trilogy. rewatching the last jedi for the podcast his resolved any of my conflicted feelings. he's a good filmmaker. give him more films, disney.

okay going back to this later after those public desantis comments makes this feel prophetic but it's for the justpearlythings video that I've had in the works for weeks

feeling better tonight. working on the star wars script so I can finish the third act. cant believe it's been a year, I feel very unreliable right now.

A person who has peace lays down in bed at night and he rests in one place. A person who has no peace lays down in bed at night and falls and falls. And when the falling down becomes the day as well as the night, that is suffering.

gonna see how much of the justpearlythings video I can record and edit, I'm really excited for this one

LMAO nevermind just realized one of the people I've been arguing with is a friend of Big Joel's who jumped into my comments to white knight for him. they're outright ignoring my central point in trying to clarify with them. gonna disengage now but feeling a tiny bit better about this given that it wasn't a random disagreement but an intentional obfuscation from someone who was never going to see my side anyway. same as it ever was.

really gotta wonder how some of the people I know get by spending all their time writing or making content. guess maybe they've had other things or people to rely on. but here I am. I dunno.

I've had some time to think about being a writer and maybe the truth is that I'm just not good and maybe the truth is people just don't want to hear any of it from me, and maybe the truth is that I'm just unlucky. I'm trying but it does seem like maybe I'll just have to fuck off and be unhappy in perpetuity doing something else

I've realized lately that content creation is kind of a wild trap as a smaller creator, because if you make it big then you can make good money, but most people don't, and yet lots of people have tried, so you're investing all this energy probably for nothing. maybe that's how it should be.

getting back to back comments where people refuse to even think about where I'm coming from, and getting them on videos where I put an insane amount of work in for relatively negligible reward is just an insanity-producing experience. truly maddening.

like, I think being a youtuber has taught me that whatever level of contempt I have for my readers, which used to be minimal to nonexistant, I should have way more. youtube commenters will watch your entire video and try to dispute something you said by raising multiple point addressed within the video and then act like that's your fault or that you're crazy for feeling talked down to.

honestly where are the tim pool fans when you need them? I'd rather get called a pedophile again than have to deal with people being insanely dismissive of this avatar essay without putting in any effort to understand where I was coming from

going to finish this jonathan chait rebuttal, record and edit all the essays to round out this month and the next month, and then some shorter stuff for september in advance before seeing where things stand.

Today's video essay is a response to fellow YouTuber Big Joel going over his take and my take on the end of Avatar: The Last Airbender, and how we differ. I felt it was instructive to make this, but want everyone to be respectful and kind to Big Joel. Hopefully we can all get something out of just talking about this. Hopefully everyone enjoys.

https://youtu.be/WbU-9ixDQco

doing research on the michael brown shooting for this jonathan chait video. nobody is going to get why I care but my hope is that lefttube viewers become familiar with some other elements of the political landscape.

finally finished that script for the justpearlythings response. thought it might take a few days, realized it would be 20 pages instead of 5 or 10. upgraded it to a week, then two weeks after realizing it would hit 30 and now 40 pages. gonna be a good one.